Like an alcoholic unable to stop drinking, sex addicts are unable to stop their self-destructive sexual behavior. Our behaviours vary: compulsive masturbation, pornography, affairs, paying for sex or being paid, voyeurism, exhibitionism, unsafe sex, abusive sex and much more besides. Family breakups, sexual diseases and other health consequences, financial disaster, loss of jobs, and risk to life are often the painful themes of our stories.

We come from all walks of life – we are ministers, doctors, homemakers, factory workers, salespeople, secretaries, clerks, accountants, therapists, dentists, politicians, to name a few. We are men and women – young and old – gay and straight – of all ethnic and religious backgrounds. None of these dividing lines mean anything to us – because they mean nothing to the disease – and we have come to believe that it is a disease.

Some of us also struggle with other addictions too like drugs, alcohol, eating disorders and compulsive gambling. Most of us didn’t know what was wrong with us – or that our condition had a name. We often thought we were just dirty, or bad, or unworthy people – we didn’t realise we were suffering from a real and treatable disease.

We made up excuses. We minimised our problem and told ourselves that “everybody is this obsessed with sex.” We denied the harm we were doing. We made solemn vows to ourselves and others. We were often depressed, some of us thought of suicide, some that they were losing their minds. All we knew for sure was that we wanted to stop, but couldn’t

If you’re in doubt – check these questions at the International SAA website.

If you think you may be a sex addict and there is no suitable face-to-face meeting in your area, try attending one or more of the telemeetings listed on this website.

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