Our stories

Every group member has their own story to tell and their views are not the opinions of SAA as a whole. In our meetings we encourage people to “listen for the similarities rather than the differences”. The stories that follow are written by current group members, many of whom have several years of sobriety. Although the writers' names have been changed, they are in our own words and from our authentic experience. We trust that they will bring you hope and inspiration.

You can read more of each story by clicking the story headline.

Members may register and login to view stories published for members only or submit their own stories for consideration.

My Story I have been struggling with my addiction to porn since I was about 14 or 15. I found a penthouse magazine underneath my dad's bed and it made me feel something inside. I was able to rent porn at the video store when I was about 15-16. I looked much older than my age. I had a job at pizzeria and made pretty good money, so a lot of it went to porn. By the time I was 18, I had multiple memberships at video stores around town. I would rotate them each week, so I didn't look like a porn freak.
Grateful for SAA webmeetings In Oct 2013 I realized I was a sex addict but I live in a town where there are no face to face meetings & I don't feel able to start a meeting myself. So these online meetings have been a lifesaver for me. I'm a gay man & before I started recognizing my addiction I was hooked on anonymous sex, online sexual contacts and was starting to get into potentially dangerous sexual activities.
Sexual anorexia, or compulsive sexual avoidance My name's James, and I'm a sexual anorexic and addict. It's not so usual to hear people introduce themselves that way in SAA, so let me explain. Sexual anorexia (or compulsive sexual avoidance) is what got me into the Twelve Step fellowships that focus on sex. I had my first sexual experience with a woman when I was 25, a lot later than I would have hoped, and since that relationship broke up, there had been nothing apart from a few dates filled with terror. Some people may choose to wait to be sexual, but I didn't choose it that way, and I was utterly powerless over avoiding or sabotaging intimacy in my life, sexual or otherwise. I knew I wasn't gay, but I couldn't explain what the problem was.
My Journey to Discovering Intimacy I had no idea I was a sex addict or a "social, emotional, sexual and spiritual anorexic." But my life greatly improved once I made that amazing discovery.
Graced and Blessed I am married--- for 34 years and have 2 grown children--- and was graced by God to have shared my SSA with my wife 4 years ago about my lifelong struggle with SSA and some resulting compulsive behaviors.
I was amazed. I am a sex addict. My “drug of choice” was having “harmless”, “secret” affairs.
My Journey My name is Darrell, a recovering sex addict, and this is my story. Denial and fear have been constant companions for as long as I can remember. It wasn't until I started my recovery December 9th 2014 did I see that these character defects shaped my life and self loathing. During the writing of my first step I saw the progression of my addiction and the damage that it caused me as well as others. Working my steps has helped me to learn to love myself and to change behaviors that have been shaped from learned behaviors I saw from Dad and Grandfather. It has helped me see generationally how deep the roots of this disease goes. I'm learning how to be emotionally present with my family, how to cope with my emotions without medicating myself with sex or porn, and how to have healthy and real intimacy with my kids and wife. Sane and sober working one day at a time.
25 Years of Acting Out and I never lived like I have these last 18 months in recovery! Like it says, I've been acting out for 25 years, in the interest of rigorous honesty I am 33. But nothing compares to how much living I have done in recovery in the last 18 months. Even better this last month that I finally got a sober sponsor! Updates as I continue to work The 12 Steps of SAA.
My name is Myles and I am a Recovering Sex Addict In everyone’s life there is a switch that gets turned on at some point in their life’s experiences. Like a one way locking switch, once the switch is turned on, it can never be turned off. The switch is labeled “Sexual Awareness”; the point in time when we become aware of our own sexuality. It may be an accident or it may be on purpose. It may be our own doing or at the forced hand of another.
My "S" Story My name is Brooks and I am a Sex Addict. I've been coming to the "S" fellowship since 1995. My journey into recovery from sexual compulsion began with a psychotherapist who recommended I utilize a similar 12 Step program that helped me stay clean and sober in AA & NA.
My Newcomer Story Hi I am Jim and I am a lust addict. I have been one since childhood. I am currently sober and have been for three days as I broke my sobriety over the weekend. I have been actively involved in recovery for 18 months as I got to the point that my viewing of porn had reached a point where I was losing my sanity. I 're-entered the rooms' of sobriety and recovery via another S fellowship where I am still active. Prior to that I had 'white knuckled' it (unsuccessfully) for nearly 12 years.
A Life Worth Living I knew all about existing. Making it from day to day. Often just waiting for it all to be over. That was the story of my childhood, adolescence, and adulthood prior to recovery. I was a survivor. I could weather any storm, and handle anything that came my way. But living, that was for other people. I could not handle living, because it meant staying present in the moment. And each moment was just too painful to face. Today, I am living life one moment at a time, and what a glorious life it is. This is my journey from survival and existing to living life to its fullest.
Newly Recovering Porn and Online addict Hi I'm Craig and I'm a sex addict. Married (still just about bless her) with a son. I have been fighting my sex addiction for several years now unsuccessfully until I finally admitted I couldn't do it alone, that I needed something, some structure, to begin to gain something like control over my life. When I joined SAA finding that the first step was admitting powerless allowed me to look at this in a meaningful way, and the 3 circles has helped to start clearing my mind. I look forward to being able to be myself more and not being so hampered by the feeling the self made disaster is around the bend. I look forward to the weekly meetings I attend to reflect and remind me why I'm on the path. Thanks to everyone at SAA for taking the time to care and share.
Hurt my Family - Voyeurism I allowed my addiction to porn hurt my whole family due to voyeurism. My girls won't talk to me right now... (I pray one day they will) so I'm here for anyone else in a similar boat.
Recovered Alcoholic but oh my I may be a Sex Addict too Hi, I'm Will, and I think I'm a Sex Addict. I don't act out with other people, but I watch entirely too much pornography, to the extent that it interferes with my life. I'd like to work the steps of SAA because quite frankly, the AA steps saved my life. So I know the steps work if you work them, of that there is no doubt. So now that the drink problem is solved, the other problem I have is related to my sexual sobriety, and I think I've found a moment of clarity but I really need to connect with a group.
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